I have a hard time keeping track of myself sometimes. I get all caught up in the wants and needs of others and the price of that is that I lose track of me. It isn’t a bad thing per se, but it makes me feel unimportant in my own life.
I woke up late this morning and now I am pressed for time to do the things that I need to do for me that are important to me. I don’t want to be late but I don’t want to let myself down either.
I feel this way a lot.
I am in this place a lot.
I am working on it though.
This blog will not be long, but I am writing it never the less. Owning that my time is constricted because I allowed the priorities of others to knock me off my routine. I didn’t get enough sleep so I overslept and now I am scrambling. Or rather, I am not. I feel like I need to scramble but I am just going to take my time. The people in my life deserve a calm and collected version of me, and that is what I am going to endeavor to provide first to myself and then to all of you.
It isn’t easy to hold my edges a lot of the time. I tend to forget myself and put others needs or desires first. But I know where that leads me...to resentment land. To dishonesty land. And I have spent enough time in both places to know that is no longer a place I want to dwell.
Sometimes it isn’t easy to not get lost. But I know, all I need do is slow down, take a few breaths and trust that all I have ever wanted or needed resides within. And my only real task is to find the willingness to go there.
Again...still.
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