I go to extremes. It is how I have lived my life. I know I am not alone, we all do in one regard or another. Some of us might be totally sane about finances, but crazy in our love lives. To another, we might be completely locked in love and reckless with our bodies, minds and spirits. I have learned the hard way that you only care for that which you cherish. And cherish is not the same as worship at all.
But in between the extremes of high and low, happy and sad, love and hate, fear and grace, I have found a middle life. One where the highs are amazing but not really all that high, and yet, they are the highest I have ever been. One where the lows are poignant and memorable. One where I can see the lesson even as the despondency sets in and threatens me with my own demise. There too, exists a middle that is still awash with low, but in no danger of circling the drain.
Life in the middle is quite wonderful. Who knew? I feel like I say that a lot. And I do because I feel like so much of my life these days is about realizing on some new level of consciousness that which I have already known for some time...I was just too self involved or wrapped up in the worship of material things to notice. Now, I notice. I see. I hear. Not necessarily new things but I am open in a way I have never been before so I can feel, with an open heart, all the things that I was too closed off from before. Make no mistake, it was all around me, all the time, I know that now, I just couldn’t, or wouldn’t allow it to permeate my hard and dedicated boundaries - the tough shell fear demands that becomes a solitary prison in which most of us live the whole of our days, safe from what we do not know, until the day we realize that we were never safe with ourselves.
It is in doing the inner work that I have been delivered to the middle. The balance point between the two extremes which has turned out to be a lot wider than I thought it might be. And a lot more peaceful, exciting and rich for development. It is here in the middle that I can finally begin to delve deeper into myself, whomever that might be in this moment. And allow all of you to show up and join me if you should so desire...living in the middle is quite wonderful, happy to be on the path to whatever beautiful reality comes next.
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