Yes, I am gonna talk about the Tyson/Paul Fight. No I didn’t watch it. I am not the biggest boxing fan, although I sure do love it as a metaphor...
I had that intuitive feeling I get, that Tyson was going to lose. And I think it was supported by what I have learned thus far about aging. I may look better than I did 20 years ago, but I am, in fact, not. My mental acuity isn’t what it used to be, I am weaker even though I appear stronger. I am fitter today because I work at it harder...because I have to.
There are so many things we take for granted in youth. Things that we arrogantly believe we still command, which leads us to do stupid fucking things like get into a boxing ring with a man 31 years younger. And jacked. Totally fucking jacked, I am sure with anabolic assistance.
Why would Tyson do this? Likely for the money. And because there were many telling him and his ego that he could wipe the floor with the 27 year old YouTuber’s ass. And as we all saw, that didn’t happen. In fact, Paul has been quoted saying that he could have ended the fight earlier and faster, but he didn’t want to humiliate the poor guy. Mercy, in a time where mercy is minimal. Interesting twist, life. Didn’t see that coming.
So let’s see, the young guy appeared to show more humility and compassion than the veteran Tyson. Actually that tracks. Gen X is nothing if not toxic and feral, again, still.
One of the things you get if you are on the planet long enough is a great many opportunities to get your ass kicked. And your ego inflated and deflated about a million fucking times. And most of our worst humiliations are because of some sort of exaggerated idea that we are better than we actually are. We are faster, smarter, hotter or fitter than reality can bear.
I swear to God it is always the times when I am feeling no pain that pain is in fact lurking around the next fucking corner, just smacking its fist into its palm, salivating over the opportunity to give me what’s for one more time. And I fall for it, still so very often. Less than I used to but hey, pride always goeth before the fall.
I am sure Tyson took the bait to fight the whippersnapper because he wanted the bragging rights. He wanted the pride and the cash. But in the end, what he fought for, ego’s ultimate jack off, landed him degraded by his own hand in front of millions of viewers.
Tyson was a force. A brutal, maniacal force. He was largely unchained for most of his life. Demonstrating to us the side effects of a life in the ring by violent accusations of rape and a world wide televised battery of ear marked proportions. Bizarre.
Side note - he was locked up in the jail where I began my legal career when he bit the guy’s ear off. All the bailiffs were all a twitter with excitement, hoping to be the chosen one to assist in his arraignment.
We know the long term effects of boxing. We know the mental decline and emotional lability that is part and parcel to any longevity in the sport. And I think Tyson’s return to the ring to attempt to knock out someone like Paul was something perhaps his medical team might have spent more time questioning.
Now saying all of that, I too wanted Paul to lose. From a Gen X’er perspective, Paul is all that is wrong with the world. He grew himself up and out from his living room, making millions of dollars off of monetizing his relatively stupid life. And whether we like him or not, his tenure on Vine and then Youtube cemented a path forward for all the content creators we all read every single day. He and his brother found a way to get laid, party and make a fucking mint and never really have to leave their house. Insane. I hate to call them pioneers because it seems to do a grave injustice to actual pioneers who suffered greatly in mind, body and spirit. I mean, from what I saw (my kids watched them) they really didn’t suffer all that much unless you call having fun, getting laid, getting drunk and high and shopping suffering all while making more money than they could spend.
I think Tyson’s fatal mistake was believing that he had anything to prove. He was arguably one of the greatest heavyweight boxers of all time. He needed to prove nothing. He already proved that earning him the “the baddest man on the planet” moniker decades earlier. Why with a rep like that would you toss your health, your rep and your pride onto a canvas where Paul could desecrate the hallowed ground you previously owned?
I guess we will never know for sure. But as someone much closer to Tyson’s age and station in life, I can see the urge to reclaim a youth and hold your own in today’s world, engenders even the most sane to do stupid fucking shit. How many people do you know in my age bracket that say the following...”yeah, I shouldn’t have tried to do that stunt at the skate park with my kid...I am not 25 any more.” This they tell you while you are holding their Starbucks for them because both their arms are in a cast.
Aging sucks. And one of the greatest things that sucketh most, is that we do not FEEL as old as we are. The inside of our minds have not aged in relation to time. I wake everyday and the 13 year old and 25 year olds that occupy most of my thoughts, ideas and life, are in a constant state of fighting for dignity while being held captive in my almost 55 year old body. So unfuckingfair. But it is the reality that all of us older people are walking around with every single day.
And apparently Mike Tyson is no different. Goaded into fighting some young stud, thinking that he had this. Fuck, he was favored to whip Paul’s ass in the 4th round. FAVORED! What the fuck? I mean, apparently most of the promoters are also my age and equally delusional.
And I will tell you that every guy I know over the age of 35 was bummed that Tyson lost so totally. It was like some sort of universal blow to all virility and masculinity. Seeing Tyson go down the way he did left a mark. And it wasn’t just to men, I felt it too. I felt the shock and depravity that was the Tyson loss. It forced me, one more fucking time to face my own tenuous existence on this planet. One more time I am reminded that I am getting older, weaker and less fierce than I once was. Godfuckingdammit!
My ego would love for me to say right here that I have the wisdom to not be called out and put myself into the position Tyson did but if you look at how I live my life, you would see ample evidence to the contrary. Fuck. So much ample evidence.
The truth is we all think we are younger, and hotter, and fitter than we really are. We all believe “we still got this” when the time when we actually had it is long gone. And when we set ourselves up to fight for dignity, we are gonna get TKO’d every fucking time...
All of us had a prime. And over 50 is not it. It can’t be. But there are so many things available to us over 50’ers that was not available to us at 27. And that is the knowledge that the wisdom we have learned in life’s most prestigious school of hard knocks is that one does not have anything to prove anymore. We can just stand on our record from our prime time in this life and sit out the calls to dismantle us blow by blow.
I would have preferred to see two younger men duke it out while Tyson looked on ringside. Laughing, drinking a beer. Face, body, mind, soul and pride in tact. Tyson’s fall was perhaps a warning to us all, that overstepping the lessons of time will always whallop ya good. So perhaps the wisdom is to know that before you agree to step into the ring.
To quote an anthem of our youth, “get in the ring motherfucker! And I’ll kick your bitchy little ass, punk!”
Except, don’t get in the actual ring. No, have the common sense to sit that particular call to fight already answered. And instead, walk yourself and your ego back to the place in time when you absolutely owned them. When you kicked their bitchy little asses, repeatedly. And offer up to no one your dignity and pride. Tyson earned the ring side seat. And now perhaps he has the grace it occupy it...right after some time and distance is lodged between his legacy and this humiliating debacle.
Time heals all wounds...even when we are the ones who offered up our dignity in the first place. You cannot fight for dignity, that is something that comes from within...and if you are having to fight for it, perhaps you never had it to begin with...
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